Iconic Crooked Monkey Original Tees

Although you may know Crooked Monkey as your leading local custom apparel and promotional item provider, we haven’t always been apart of the promo business.  In 2005, Crooked Monkey began by selling our first shirt (the Fu$k Duke shirt) out of the dorms at the University of Maryland. The following year, we launched our first line of Original Crooked Monkey t-shirts and were picked up by National Jean Company and in 2006 we landed two more gigs when Lord and Taylor picked up our line. Throughout our years of creating t-shirts, we at Crooked Monkey have produced countless tee’s displaying comedic gold that stand out among the crowd of endless humorous graphic t-shirts. For reference and a better understanding of where Crooked Monkey first began its journey, we have put together a list of 10 of the most Iconic Crooked Monkey Original tees. Check them out!

1. No One’s Ugly After 2AM

Upon reading the slogan, we can almost bet that you immediately had a friend come to mind who would be the perfect recipient of this t-shirt. Someone that just won’t head home from the bars alone after a night out? Don’t worry, it’s not just your group, we all have that friend- which is exactly why we created the “No One’s Ugly After 2am” tee. The perfect tagline and an even better Friday night ensemble for your Weekend Warrior, landing the “No One’s Ugly After 2am” t-shirt at number one on our list of iconic original Crooked Monkey tees

2. DJ Honest Abe

Have you ever seen something so genius, something so original, off the wall, and down right brilliant? Neither had we, which is exactly why we created the DJ Honest Abe t-shirt. We guarantee this tee will be an instant conversation starter… Wear it out to the bar, to a craft beer tasting, or maybe even to Thanksgiving dinner next week. Everyone hates the dreaded Holiday small talk, so when old aunt Sally asks about your life plans, hit her with the- “I only mix by candlelight” tagline. She’ll be left in utter confusion which allows you a second to dip out to the desert table.DJ Honest Abe is a one of a kind t-shirt and one that is guaranteed to get some attention- Landing old Abe at #2 on our list of iconic original Crooked Monkey t-shirts.

3. Pug Life

Calling all dog lovers! Back when the whole “Thug Life” slogan really began to take off, we thought it would be a cool idea to put our own spin on the phrase and create another iconic original Crooked Monkey t-shirts. A special shout out to Pugsley, our inspiration for the comedic gold and one of our most versatile tees to date. Why so versatile you ask? Well, our Pug Life tee makes the perfect gift for everyone…. For your niece, local animal shelter volunteer, or that guy up on the corner whose house always reeks of skunk. We’re sure everyone loves a Pug Life t-shirt!

4. The Suspenders & Tie

Remember the iconic 80’s-90’s tuxedo tees? They were casual by nature, but the bow tie, tuxedo shirt, and lapels screen-printed on the front most definitely spruced up the presentation and had the potential to lighten up the mood of any stuffy old formal event.  As times have changed, so have the trends, and the hipster movement has taken its place in fashion. So, we at Crooked Monkey decided to put a more modern spin on the iconic Tuxedo t-shirt and give the millennials exactly what they want and need to avoid the actuality of suspenders… I give you the “Suspenders and Tie Tee.”

5. College Misses Me

You know that guy from your graduating class that just cant seem to let go of the college lifestyle? He has a degree in Psych but doesn’t want to leave his serving gig because a day job would take away from his afternoon naps?  He never misses a Thirsty Thursday, he’s at every tailgate sporting his frat letters, and hes always prepared for a game of beer pong? Yeah, we made this shirt with him in mind. Does college miss him? Probably not. But hey, College probably doesn’t miss us either. We got chased by the cops through the quad for selling t-shirts (story for another time.) Which is yet another reason why we created this shirt and exactly why we picked it as number five for our list of iconic original Crooked Monkey tees.

6. Boxed Wine

Chances are, your love for wine started from a game of slap the bag in a frat house stair well on a college campus near you. So as far as were concerned, no ones too classy for a little bit of boxed wine. Plus, we heard that if you stick a straw straight in to the bag, it qualifies itself as an adult CapriSun, and that is the exact energy we all need in our lives! ..And good reasoning for why we have chosen our Boxed Wine tee as number six on our list of iconic Crooked Monkey original t-shirts.

7. Go Green or Go Home

Recent environmentalist report that we have just 20 more years before there is no turning back on the detrimental state our environment is entering. Unfortunately, this extremely prominent news takes a back seat to so much of the garbage we see in the media. Thats why we thought it was a good idea to create a t-shirt that promoted the lifestyle necessary to improve our environment. Go Green or Go Home is one of our all time favorite tees and as we continue to live in a society that doesn’t properly stress the need for the green, we thought it would be a great idea to bring this gem out of our vault of Iconic Crooked Monkey original tees.

8. I’m A Lover not A Dater

(Ghosting- When a person cuts off all communication with the person they’re dating, without warning or notice before hand. Usually executed through ignored phone calls, text messages, and blocked social media accounts.) Does this sounds like something you or someone you know is guilty of? Probably so, because for today’s generation it’s just easier to fall of the face of the earth than it is to actually approach someone with how you’re feeling. Thats why our “I’m A Lover, Not A Dater Shirt” landed itself the number eight spot on our list of Iconic Crooked Monkey original tees.

9. Winner

As Charlie Sheen likes to remind the world, its just better to be #winning. Unfortunately, not all of us are rich enough to refer to our gigantic fails as wins, and some of us have just never won a damn thing. That’s why we created our “Winner” t-shirt. Ambiguous? Yes. But we decided to leave the story line up to you. Whenever someone asks what is is you’ve won, its your place to decide. Maybe your intramural football team won their game this week, maybe you got a .20 cent raise at work, or maybe you just made it there on time today? Whatever it is, you’re a winner and nobody can take that from you… your t-shirt says so! Just like no other shirt can take this number nine spot on our list of iconic Crooked Monkey original tees(;

10. Starving Blogger

Back in the day when we first created this t-shirt, this tagline was as relevant as they come. These days, bloggers aren’t just writers, they’re social influences. Lifestyle blogs have become tools for businesses to promote their latest and greatest products, making it easy for bloggers all over the world to turn their hobby in to a career. But with Instagram’s recent eliminations of likes, we expect some changes. How can a social influencer’s popularity be evaluated to ensure they are worthy of collaborations without likes? Well, we don’t know and we don’t really care because were in the t-shirt business… BUT we do have a cute shirt for you to wear when your career goes down the tank! Therefor the Starving Blogger shirt earns the number ten spot on our list of iconic Crooked Monkey original tees.

After all that, I bet your inspired to create a t-shirt of your very own. Head on over to Crooked Monkeys completely custom designer to get started on your today! Questions? That’s what were here for, completely custom designer and lets get that order working!